Well I’m back here posting on Lameking, again. I was busy the last few weeks planning a hiking trip up K2 with my friend Adam, but sadly it fell through. Adam said he could get a deal or some sort of 2 for 1 discount on the helicopter rental and English speaking pilot through some page he found on Google but reality set in when we found out that this great 2 for 1 discount would still cost us almost $20,000 fucking dollars.
I met this girl (Not the one pictured here but the girl I did meet did have brown hair and boobs which is close enough) a few weeks ago in a bar and ended up back at her place somehow, and by the powers that be I some how managed a little action. The best thing is that she’s pretty dirty and despite my shotty track record with women and my questionable sexuality preference as of late (Ahem, tranny pornos!) we’ve been sending nasty texts back and forth all day and it makes my day go by a little faster (Well, I’m unemployed at the moment so it speeds up the commercials).
I have the iPhone and I have a bad habit of clicking too quickly and when you pair that with not caring too much it’s a deadly combination. Her name is Brandy and I have a guy named Brandon B right next to each other in my address book and I accidentally texted “I woke up this morning with a hard on and I masturbated thinking of my fingers in your ass” to my auto mechanic and sadly I didn’t get a response. I guess I’ll have to find a new mechanic now due to me fingering some random girls butt.
This week is starting off great, no K2 and I have to find a new mechanic. Or the kicker could be he’s been secretly hoping to receive this text from me and it’s taking him 24 hours to select his words very carefully when he responds. The anticipation is killing me here. Well, Brandy is calling, I’d better go. Stay tuned this could be a pretty funny story.
Entries (RSS)